First post in 2011, new background color

did not expect myself to hold on so long

i guess because i got awesome friends to keep me going on

but now I am finally turning to blog again

i think i really feels sucks inside
people say they understand

but do they really do?

no i don think so

do they know what i want
they always think my life is easy

and it always seems that i am at fault

like i am the one not putting in the effort

i know it is not totally their fault

as they are not me so they wound't fully understand me

i am so use to doing things my way

and i don like to explain it much why i did it

although i know someone told me be4

that if u did not want people to ask you

then u explain it first but it just not me

and so after keep for so long

i think i need to rant it all out here

no matter if anyone sees it

people who know me should know i am quitting school

yes i am quitting!!! and every single human will

keep bombard me with questions!

and truth is i do hate the school system

but i really like to study there

the reason for not staying is i know myself well

i cant survive there

i bloody hell have to work

imagine waking up at 6.30am

school till 3.30pm and rush for work

start work at 5pm and finish work at 12.30am

reach home at 1am and sleep at 2am
so how the fuck can i focus in class

and u people ask me not to work
so who the fuck want to support me

i don have good parents like other people

paying for their school fees and daily life

i am doing all this myself

and i am not complaining about it

i just need a single soul to understand it!
not that i am thick skin don wan ask them from money

but how am i suppose to ask them

when i know they themselves having difficulty

and always complaining they don have money

i know i am not poor and can support myself

but my problem is i want to financially support them

and thats what i cant do now
i know that studies it important

but i also know that when u cant meet your ends
thats when work is more important than anything

and i feel sucks for always sleeping in the day

and working in the night

i cant spend any moments with my friends

and i get so tired out that i neglected them

u know i do see their problems everyday

but i cant do anything

it really sucks a lot

sometimes i just don understand

why do we have to study so much since young

at the end of the day, it is just to get a good cert/ qualification

and the use of it is to get a easy better high paid job

but seriously sometimes i just don give a damn

all i want is a simple life not a luxury life

and please don pity me

because i don find my life miserable at all!

我真的觉得很无能为力

ps. idk since when u started to avoid me